One Liners
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
One Liners
In the movie "Bernie'"
"He doesn't know anything about hunting. He can't tell a duck blind from an outhouse."
And on public radio's "The People's Pharmacy" a physician, when speaking of another individual he thought to be way off base, said "He is one taco short of a combo plate."
"He doesn't know anything about hunting. He can't tell a duck blind from an outhouse."
And on public radio's "The People's Pharmacy" a physician, when speaking of another individual he thought to be way off base, said "He is one taco short of a combo plate."
Dallas Baillio
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
- Eric Sandstrom
- Posts: 31
- Joined: Fri Dec 23, 2005 8:07 am
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
What we say about our youngest dog, Tonto, who ain't too bright:
"Not the brightest bulb in the chandelier"
"Not the sharpest knife in the drawer"
And, no, my avatar is NOT Tonto. That's Shiloh, who is rather bright.
"Not the brightest bulb in the chandelier"
"Not the sharpest knife in the drawer"
And, no, my avatar is NOT Tonto. That's Shiloh, who is rather bright.
Joe and Lucinda
Tonto, Meadow and Shadow, the papillons
Shiloh and Morpho at Rainbow Bridge
2017 Spirit
Formerly 2006 24RB
Tonto, Meadow and Shadow, the papillons
Shiloh and Morpho at Rainbow Bridge
2017 Spirit
Formerly 2006 24RB
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
I know I shouldn't but I have little self control.
One from the Internet:
...Two vampires walked into a bar and called for the bartender. "I'll have a glass of blood," said one. "I'll have a glass of plasma", said the other. "Okay," replied the bartender, "that'll be one blood and one blood lite..."
One from the Internet:
...Two vampires walked into a bar and called for the bartender. "I'll have a glass of blood," said one. "I'll have a glass of plasma", said the other. "Okay," replied the bartender, "that'll be one blood and one blood lite..."
Dallas Baillio
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
And one more:
A guy goes into a nice restaurant bar wearing a shirt open at the collar and is met by a bouncer who tells him he must wear a necktie to gain admission. So the guy goes out to his car and he looks around for a necktie and discovers that he just doesn't have one. He sees a set of jumper cables in his trunk. In desperation he ties these around his neck, manages to fashion a fairly acceptable looking knot and lets the ends dangle free. He goes back to the restaurant and the bouncer carefully looks him over for a few minutes and then says, "Well, OK, I guess you can come in -- just don't start anything."
A guy goes into a nice restaurant bar wearing a shirt open at the collar and is met by a bouncer who tells him he must wear a necktie to gain admission. So the guy goes out to his car and he looks around for a necktie and discovers that he just doesn't have one. He sees a set of jumper cables in his trunk. In desperation he ties these around his neck, manages to fashion a fairly acceptable looking knot and lets the ends dangle free. He goes back to the restaurant and the bouncer carefully looks him over for a few minutes and then says, "Well, OK, I guess you can come in -- just don't start anything."
Dallas Baillio
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
OK. What is an apathetic, dyslexic agnostic? Someone who doesn't care whether or not there is a Dog.
Last edited by shilohdad on Tue Nov 26, 2013 9:04 am, edited 1 time in total.
Joe and Lucinda
Tonto, Meadow and Shadow, the papillons
Shiloh and Morpho at Rainbow Bridge
2017 Spirit
Formerly 2006 24RB
Tonto, Meadow and Shadow, the papillons
Shiloh and Morpho at Rainbow Bridge
2017 Spirit
Formerly 2006 24RB
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
OK Joe,
Another along your line,
Atheism is a non-prophet organization
Another along your line,
Atheism is a non-prophet organization
Last edited by Dallas Baillio on Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
Dallas Baillio
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
- Dallas Baillio
- Posts: 1181
- Joined: Sun Jul 02, 2006 10:52 pm
Just in time for Christmas:
Rudolph Button was a long time member of the Communist Party. One day sitting at home with his wife he looked out the window and saw it had begun to lightly rain. "Looks like it is beginning to rain" he said. His wife replied that it looked like a clear day to her. He replied "You must need glasses, Rudolph the Red knows rain dear."
Rudolph Button was a long time member of the Communist Party. One day sitting at home with his wife he looked out the window and saw it had begun to lightly rain. "Looks like it is beginning to rain" he said. His wife replied that it looked like a clear day to her. He replied "You must need glasses, Rudolph the Red knows rain dear."
Dallas Baillio
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
2001 26RSB
Born Free Leap'n Lions RV Club Member
Not too bright
Not running on all cylinders.
One short of a 6 pack.
Not playing with a full deck.
And I too have one not too bright dog. NOT the Papillons....Ho! they are devious geniuses. It's the Other One..... the rescued Longhair Chihuahua. Odie, the shelter dog. He's "different". He does figure things out after awhile, and when he does, he is so happy with himself. It's a little sad, but a lot endearing. And am I delusional, or can I tell what they are thinking by the look on their faces?
Oh, yeah, this is a joke thread. Anyone know the 3 legged pig or not?
One short of a 6 pack.
Not playing with a full deck.
And I too have one not too bright dog. NOT the Papillons....Ho! they are devious geniuses. It's the Other One..... the rescued Longhair Chihuahua. Odie, the shelter dog. He's "different". He does figure things out after awhile, and when he does, he is so happy with himself. It's a little sad, but a lot endearing. And am I delusional, or can I tell what they are thinking by the look on their faces?
Oh, yeah, this is a joke thread. Anyone know the 3 legged pig or not?